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"The rich person says "You can have whatever water trickles over the edge"The drunk says: Which glass?The Plumber says: You've got a leak.This one is ...ompliments of DonYou Might Be A Conservative if...You've named your kids "Deduction one" and"Deduction two."You've tried to argue that poverty could be abolished if people were just allowed to keep more of their minimum wage.You've ever referred to someone as "my (insert racial or ethnic minority here) friend"You've ever tried to prove Jesus was. Then, today, Gary and Moira and me, we went to this beach on the far side of Maui. We had to drive for, like, a couple of hours to get there, which is pretty amazing that you can drive that far on this small an island. Anyway, it's this cove with red sand that's really pretty. There's another cove with black sand next door. Anyway, we hiked around this rocky headland on this little trail, and as we came around into the black cove, I couldn't believe it. Everybody was naked, Jake! Gary took us. "Not in a million years," Elizabeth said, all cordiality gone from her voice."We do have one extra seat, Chuck," Chris said. "So when Abby starts to stray, you can join us if you want. Lupe said you've been acting almost like a human the past few days." Rico and Tomas put the fear of God into him," Elizabeth said. "But, yeah, you can join us once slut-girl there goes off to steal someone else's boyfriend. But if she's with you, don't bother."Chuck looked at Abby and nodded."Yeah," Chuck said,. It was too close to Sally's time. She was more important. In fact, she was just coming to the door. I looked up at her and smiled. Fuck this telephone shit. Our times together were becoming too precious. I never knew what she was going to come up with, but I think I liked the 'nothing' days the best. We often just sat quietly holding each other, not talking, not petting, just being. Doin' nothin'."I'll be there at 2:30." Sally heard me and smiled at the timing."Now, Sampson."I suppose I should.
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